Hindi SMS

Woh College ki Kashti…………
Yeh degree bhi lelo ye naukari bhi lelo

Bhale Chheen lo mujhse USA ka Visa

magar mujhko lauta do college ka canteen

vo chaay ka pani vo teeKha samosaa

college ki sabse purani nishaanee

vo chaayvaalaa jise saare kehte the… jaani

vo jaani ke hathon ki ‘cutting’ chaay meethee

vo chupkese journal mein bheji hui chitthi

vo padhte hi chiththi uska bhadakna

vo chehre ki laali vo aankhon ka gussaa…

kadi dhoop mein apne ghar se nikalnaa

vo project ki Khatir shahar bhar bhataknaa

vo lecture mein doston ki proxy lagaanaa

vo sir ko chidhanaa ,vo aeroplane udaanaa

vo submission ki raton ko jagnaa jagaanaa

vo orals ki kahani vo practical ka kissaa….

bimaari ka detention ke time bahanaa

vo doosron ke assignments ko apnaa banaanaa

vo seminar ke din paironka chhatpatanaa

vo workshop mein din raat pasinaa bahanaa

vo exam ke din ka bechain maahaul

par vo maa ka vishvas - Teacher ka Bharosaa…

college ki wo lambisi raatein

vo doston se canteen me pyaari si baatein

vo gathering ke din ka ladnaa Jhagadnaa

vo ladkiyon ka yuhin hamesha akadnaa

bhulaaye nahin bhool sakta hai koi

vo college, vo basen, vo shararatein vo javani…

vo kagaz ki kashti vo barish ka pani…

Santa Se Puchha Ki-

“Tum Next Janam Me Kya Banna Pasand Karoge?
Santa-”Cockroach”
Why?

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kyuki…. Meri Wife Sirf Cockroach Se Hi Darti Hai….

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Ek PHOTOGRAPHER
HIMESH ki dur se
PHOTO le raha tha
GUESS WHAT DID
HIMESH SAY?

?

Zara zoom zoom
Karo zoom zoom
Zara zoom zoom Karo zoom.

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Banta: yaar santa e baat bata …

Truck dekhkar tum kaampte kyon ho..?

Santa: Ek truck driver meri biwi lekar bhaag gaya tha,

mujhe is baat ka dar lagta hai

jaise usko vapas karne aaya hai…..

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pagal hone ka sabse aasaan tarika
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Uff, , pagal hone ka kitna shauk hai, ki tarika dhunda ja raha hai..

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life me kabhi serious na hona
tention na lena
always find time 2 laugh
varna log kahenge ghor kalyug aya he aj kal
CARTOON b nahi haste

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Wife hinting husband 4 a new car
Says : “Dear, buy me something that goes 0-100 in 3 sec when i am on it”
He gifted her a weighing machine

Aasmaan mein kaali ghata chaaiyi hai,
aaj fir girl friend se maar khaayi hai
kahti hai ki sudhar jao,
magar meri galti nahi hai doston
barabar waali ladki aaj mini skirt mein aayi hai.

Aasmaan mein kaali ghata chaayi hai…

usko dekh meri haalat chakrayi hai,
dil mein baat karne ki khwahish aayi hai.
par aaj kismat ne bhi tangdi khayi hai
aaj meri gf mere saath mein market aayi hai.

Aasmaan mein kaali ghata chaayi hai…

saare armanoo ki hui aaj vidai hai
arre bhai maine uske saamne maar khaayi hai
sharam ne mooh par laali lagayi hai
par dil hai ki maanta nahi
chupke se karta mooh dikhai hai.

Aasmaan mein kaali ghata chaayi hai…
aaj fir girl friend se maar khaayi hai…
Kitney Achey Hotey Hein Bachpan Key Wo Din,

Hathaan mein hath milake,
Hathaan mein hath milake,
angoothi churake uno chali gayi,
abhi galae milne ku aari,
kya karati ki kya ki…….

chay peenae ku aake,
chay peenae ku aake,
saucer churaake uno chali gayi,
abhi full meals ku aari,
kya karati ki kya ki…….

pehlichh mulaakat mein ,
pehlichh mulaakat mein ,
five star mein uno merkoo chunna lagai,
abhi date pe lekae jaao bolri,
kya karati ki kya ki…….
sagai-sagai bolkae,
sagai-sagai bolkae,
puri shopping karali,
abhi shaadi-shaadi bolri
kya karati ki kya ki…….

Do Chaar Botlein Rakh Lo Kafan Mein,
Kabr Par Baith Kar Piya Karenge,
Khuda jab Maangega Gunaahon ka Hisaab,
Use Bhi Jaam Bhar Bhar Kar Diya Karenge.

Teri Rswaai Ne Marna Sikhaya,
Teri Bewfaai Ne Jeena Sikhaya,
Tere Jaane Ke Baad Aaye Kuch Daur Aise Bhi,
Jisne Mujhe Jeene Ke Liye Peena Sikhaya.

Peene Pilane Ki Kya Baat Karte Ho,
Kabhi Hum Bhi Piya Karte The,
Jitni Tum Jaam Mein Liye Baithe Ho,
Utni Hum Paimaane Mein Chod Diya Karte The.

Kaun Kiske Kareeb Hota Hai,
Apna Apna Naseeb Hota Hai,
Yaad Aata Hai Jab Koi Hud Se Jyada,
To Dard Dil Ke Kareeb Hota Hai.

Vikas Wadhwa (Vicky)

Gam ko karo delete,
Khushi ko karo save,

Rishto ko karo recharge,
Dosti ko karo download,

Dushmani ko karo erase,
Such ko karo broadcast,

Jhoot ko karo switch off,
Tension ko karo not reachable,

Pyar ki karo incoming on,
Nafrat ki karo outgoing off,

Language ko karo control,
Hassi ka karo outbox full,

Aansu ka karo inbox khaali,
Gusse ko karo hold,

Muskan ko karo send,
Help ko karo ok,

Self ko karo autolock,
Dil ko karo vibrate,

Phir dekho life ki ringtone kitni
POLYPHONIC ho jayegi

True Friend Is Someone Who
Reaches For Your Hand And
Touches Your Heart …
Kehte hain ki ISHQ main neend ur jaati hai
Koi humse bhi ishq kare
Khambhaqat neend bahut aati hai
———— ———
Kar diya izhare-ishq hamne telephone par,
laakh rupaye ki bat thi,
do rupaye main ho gayee (wah wah)
———— ———
Maine tujhe dekha
Dekhta raha,
Dekhta hi gaya……..
Phir mujhe chashma lag gaya
———— ———
Aur bhi cheezain bahut see lut chuki hain dil ke saath
Ye bataya dooston ne ishq furmane ke baad;
Is liye kamre ki ek ek cheez “ckeck” karta hoon main
“Ek tere aane se pehle, ek tere jaane ke baad”
———— ———
Taj Mahal kya cheez hai
main to usse bhi bara mahal banaoonga,
aree Mumtaz to marke dafan hui thi,
main to tujhe zinda hi dafna doonga.
———— ———
KAASH TERE CHEHRE PE
CHICKENPOX KE DAAG HOTE
CHAND TO TUM HO HI
SITARE BHI SAATH HOTE
———— ———
Jise samjha Leher Pepsi
Woh nikla Jeher Pepsi
Jise samjha Coca Cola
Woh nikla Dhoka Cola
Ab piyo Wine and Whisky
Life hoga No More Risky
———— ———
Khirki khuli zulfein bikhri
Dilne kaha dildar nikla
Par haire meri footi kismat
Nahaya hua sardar nikla
———— ———
Zindagi to hum bhi jee rahe thay,
Taqdeer humari kharab nikli
Tajmahal hum bhi bana sakte thay,
Mumtaz humari bewafa nikli
———— ———
Kaash dil ki awaz ka itna asar ho jaaye
Hum unhe yaad karen
Aur unhe khabar ho jaaye
———— ———
Aansu ko ankhon ki
Dehliz pe laya na karo.
Apne dil ki halat
Kisiko bataya na karo.
Log mutthi bhar namak liye
Ghoom rahe hain
Apne zakhm kisiko
Dikhaya na karo.
———— ———
Mohabbat ki shamma jalake to dekho,
Zara dil ki duniya saja kar to dekho,
Tumhe ho na jaaye mohabbat to kehna,
Zara humse nazaren milake to dekho.
———— ———
Log ishq karte hain,
Bare shor ke saath.
Humne bhi kiya,
Bare zor ke saath.
Magar ab karenge,
Thora gaur ke saath.
Kyonki kal usko dekha,
Kisi aur ke saath.
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Ta mam umar zindagi se door rahe,
Teri khushi ke liye tujse door rahe
Ab is se badkar wafa ki saza kya hogi
Ki tere hokar bhi tujse door rahe.
———— ———
Ankhen apki ho, par ansu mere
Zindagi apki ho, par sanse meri
Dil apka ho, par dharkan meri
Zindagi ke akhri mor par dua hogi yahi
Kafan apka ho, aur maut meri.
———— ———
Jab bhi apse milne ki takdeer nazar ayi
Mujhe pavon main bandhi zanjeer nazar ayi
Teri yaad main nikal pare mere aansu
Har aansu main teri tasweer nazar ayi.
———— ———
Talaash karo koyi tumhe mil jayega
Magar humari tarah tumhe kaun chahega
Zaroor koyi chahat ki nazar se tumhe dekhega
Magar hamara dil kahan se layega.
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Pyaar ke jaam ko aise na piyo ke
Adha piya aur adha chor diya
Yaron yeh pyaar hai pyaar
Nahin koi Max Bar
Jo thora sa lagaya aur bas hogaya…… .!!

Zindagi Hai To Khwaab Hai
Zindagi Hai To Khwaab Hai
Khwaab Hai To Manzilein Hai
Manzilein Hai To Fasaley Hai
Fasaley Hai To Rastey Hai
Rastay Hai To Mushkilein Hai
Mushkilein Hai To Hausla Hai
Hausla Hai To Vishawas Hai
Vishvas hai to Paisa hai
Paisa hai to Shohrat hai
Shohrat hai to Izzat Hai
Izzat hai to Ladki hai
Ladki hai to Tension hai
Tension hai to Concern hai
Concern hai to a Khayaal hai
Khayaal hai to Khwaab hai
Khawab hai to Growth hai
Growth hai to Zindagi hai
Zindagi hai to khwaab hai
Matlab duniya Gol Gol hai
Bas ghumnewala chahiye……

Safar lamba hai, Dost banate rahiye,
Dil mile na mile, Hath badhate rahiye,
Taj na banaye, Costly padega,
Har taraf Mumtaj banate rahiye.

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Suno!
Mehsoos karo,
Badal ki Garaj,
Bijli ki chamak,
Barish ki ek ek bond,
Tum se
Cheekh cheekh kar
Kah rahi hai,
“Ab to naha lo”

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Marne par humain janat mile na mile,
Ye hava ye fiza mile na mile,
SmS karne main kasar mut chorna
Maloom nahi opar jaa kar mobile mile na mile

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Aap k chehre pear ghazub ki smile hai
Suna hai aap k pass b mobile hai
Jis mein “SmS” ki aik moti is file hai
Phir bhi sms nahi karte yeh kon as style hai

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Gandhiji Ager DON Hote To Kahte
Hamare Sir Per Baal Aane Ka IntZaar to
11 Dukanon k Hajam Kar Rahe Hain
Lekin Takle Per Baal Aana Mushkil he Nahi Namumkin Hain

**

Aapko phone kiya to network bola,
Namaskar, paglo ki duniya me aapka swagat hai,
Aap jis pagal se baat karna chahte hai
Is waqt uska DIMAAG switch off hai plz try later

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Aap k brain ki x-ray report AA gai hai,
10g mitti, 10g kankar pathar, 25 type k kire makore,
5g makri k jale and 500g bhusa.
Kamal hai! Mujhe lagta tha k khali hoga

**

Chuhe ne sherni ko Propose Kiya.
Sherni : Chal Bay!! Kabhi Shishe Me Apni Shakal Dekhi hai?
Chuha: Are Pagli Shakal Pay Mat Jaa Confidence Dekh

1.Teri aankain jhuki jhuki
tera chehra khila khila
jab tere chehre per haath ghumaya
to aadha kilo fair & lovely mila

2.Safed rang ho agar mehboob ka ,
toh mohabbat ki detergent khusbudar nazar aati hai,
na koi aur hota kharid-dar SURF-EXCEL KA,
aur na dhulai RIN-SUPREME ki kam nazar aati hai…!!!

3.Tu mere dil mein aise samaayi hai
Jaise baajre ke khet mein bhains ghus aayi hai

4.Unki Gaali ke chakkar kaat te kaat te,kutte humaare yaar ho gaaye,
Unki Gaali ke chakkar kaat te kaat te,kutte humaare yaar ho gaaye,
Woh to humhe naa mili…….. ……… .
Magaar hum kutton ke Sardaar ho gaaye!!!

5.Chand par kaali ghata chaati to hogi,
Sitaron mein Chamak aati to hogi.
Tum lakh chupao Duniya se, magar akeley mein
tumhe apni shakal pe hansi aati to Hogi

6.Lohe ko Loha kat ta hai …
Sone Ko Sona Kat ta hai…
Jaher ko Jaher kat ta hai…
Isliye apko Kutta katega

7.Tum kya jano gum kya hota hai.
Tum kya jano gum kisey kehate hai.
Tum kya jano gum kya cheez hoti hai.
Tumne to hamesha fevicol use kiya hai

8.Ladka apni dilruba se pooch raha hai
Kya pyaar karna paap hai?
Kya pyaar karna paap hai?
Ladke ka dost uske kaan mein bolta hai
Abbey patli gali pakad peeche uska baap hai